Lorraine from Madras wonders
Where Earl is precisely
When he comes home drunk from the arrack shop
She gives him nicely

'What men,' says Donald uncle
Play some decent songs - please!
You're always playing that rubbish
Play some nice Jim Reeves
-----------------------------------
All you bloody Anglo-Indians
Think your blood is blue
All the other Indians
Think you're a bunch of gandoos

Always calling everybody
Uncle and aunty
Think you look like Britishers
But you talk like Mahatma Gandhi
------------------------------------
Now there's Martin Gomez, a nancy boy
A hijra from Andheri
Hides his balls and plays with dolls
They call him Bombay Mary

In Ulasnagar that shania bugger
Tom is getting a lick
Came home last night from Grant Rd
Puss oozing from his - ai-yi-yi-yo
------------------------------------
That Lancie Miranda
Thinks no end of himself
Thinks he's very fair-skinned
And when he farts it doesn't smell

He's there in church everyday
Acting very pious
But he sticks his nose in everything
And sticks his thing in the aaya
-------------------------------------
Come from Dubai, Come from Bahrain
Gold Rolex watch
Dressed in Nike, dressed in Gucci
Only drinking Scotch

That peethay bugger Jerome's back
The girl's are impressed
No money for food, the rent's not paid
But they're beautifully dressed
---------------------------
Meanwhile in Calcutta the boys are getting
Ready for the flicks
Four annas in the pocket
But they have to take two ricks

In Barrackpore, by a puchka man
There's a girl who's very cute
But they turn and run when she yells at them
&*&^% off you ma-ka-&^$%@
-------------------------------
All you bloody Ango-Indians
Think your blood is blue
All the other Indians
Think you're a bunch of gandoos

Budha-sahibs. Mem-sahibs!
Union Jack up the pole
Pahndy in the blood stream
Skin as black as coal
----------------
In Bangalore the boochie-combs
Are rounding up the lice
It's Sunday morning, mama's making
Ball curry and yellow rice

A peg of rum, a filter tip
A toast to the old Cawnpore
Or sip a tea, suck a beedie
Play Bill Black's bloody combo
-------------------------------------
20 million Anglo Indians
Spread all over the globe
Some love reunions
Some prefer anal probes

You gotta love 'em - these Anglo-Indians
in their their banyans and their chuddies
If you don't they'll give you two slaps,
And take away the biriyani
(might even give you two kottoos on your nut)
---------------------------------------

Additional lyrics:

At Fraser Town Buddee Girl
Is being fingered by Uncle Dick
If he doesn't watch out
Jane Auntie will shout
And give him a damn good lick

In McKluskiegunge they're still tellling tales
In all the tea shops
How AIs threw rice on the ground
And waited for the crops

In Tangaserri the widows are merry
While the Tangy boys still drop
Some from having sea baths
But most in toddy shops

With names like Lee, or Edwards, or Allen,
All sounding very English
But if you scratch a little deep
You'll find a Fernandes